The EsO Ya Digg!!!

I remember last year, it was about yesterday last year that I found your page; till this day, its still one of the most important days of my life because it was that day that I regained hope. Every now and again I would check up on your page and I see that you don’t make posts like the ones that captured my soul (“Ventilation” & “I Do Love You”)

I guess its because you’ve transitioned since then, grown as a person since you first made them posts. Well I guess like all novelties, they wear off but never forget that this one novelty defines you, it may not be radiant through your posts anymore but probably in person it shines through everything you do.

Just like you, I’ve grown as a person since I first read them posts too. I wouldn’t say as much as you because I’m still without ‘The One’ and it’s a lot harder to grow when you’re alone. But I feel like I’ve made a significant amount of growth through this year on my own, some of that was spring boarded off of the inspiration I got from you, and I want to thank you for that.

I’ve been looking for the girl I could call mine my whole life, I’ve been looking for my ‘The One’, you’re not available are you? Don’t mind my foolish mouth, I know that even if you were available you wouldn’t be my ‘The One’ because you’ve already found yours and he’s found his, and I doubt you would ever give up on him that easily or him on you.

But I tried this year; I gave it my best, my all. I put myself out there like never before and I sit here on New Years Eve writing to you just like how I was last year, alone!

I had a chance a few weeks back, I met a girl on the day before I broke up for uni (leaving it late, yh I know) and I wanted her just like how I wanted all the other girls in the past, but this time I said fuck it and went all out. It didn’t work out in the end. I poured my heart out to her friend (only person I could contact at the time) about how much I wanted to get to know her, but it didn’t happen.

I thought that if I wanted it so much, put in my all, and gave it my best the universe would conspire to make it work…but I ended up walking home alone on the streets at 4am in the night the next day, after waiting for her at the canteen all day, while drawing! (Don’t judge me! I had a late night work shift ok!)

I guess at times it just doesn’t work out for some people, not because they’re not worthy, not because they can’t have it, its just because it’s not time (FUCK YOU LADY LUCK!) Well I don’t know I’m just spit balling here.

Sometimes I look to your blog to find motivation again but then I remember you haven’t made a post like that for almost a year and I already know why. But I can never lose hope because every time I see your pic on tumblr I’m reminded that you are the living, breathing and realistic example of ‘The One’.

I just wanted to remind you of that. Peace Out!

The EsO Ya Digg!!!

heysoulmate:

(Source: speaktomy-heart)

dominiricuanegraaa:

(Source: johnisidro)